THE BERGEY BUNCH: Bonding moments...

I love this girl already! I am so happy for her! I hope you are as moved as I am about what is taking place in Johanna's life right now, the miracle and wonder of it all! God is good, ALL THE TIME! THE BERGEY BUNCH: Bonding moments...

THE BERGEY BUNCH: It's Official!

This is the Bergey family update. I want to share their story with you so you will be familiar with what my family will be undergoing in a couple of months while in China to bring Mei Mei home. Also, I just think how precious it is that this little girl is so eager to receive love from her forever family, and how adaptable she is when given the love of her mother to guide her steps. Plus, the idea that she knows my little girl and has shared a history with her makes me smile and cry. THE BERGEY BUNCH: It's Official!

THE BERGEY BUNCH: Gotcha Day

THE BERGEY BUNCH: Gotcha Day


Just wanted to update you with you the good news of the Bergey family "Gotcha" Day! Their daughter, Johanna, who is turning fourteen this week, adopted in the nick of time! God is never early, and He is never late. He is always RIGHT ON TIME.


As you read Selina's post, please take special note that Selina will be visiting Johanna's (and Mei Mei's) orphanage on Friday China time which is Thursday our time. I'm not sure of the exact time, but when i find out, you'll be the first to know, well...after I tell Randy.


Selina will have an opportunity i pray to see our daughter and to take pics of our little darling, and if LOA doesn't come by then, I am going to ask Selina to leave Cassandra's package from her forever family with her nannies. Even without LOA, someday i can sit Cassie Mei down and show her the pictures that were taken of her at her momma's urging, and hopefully she will find comfort in knowing from the time I looked at her innocent little face back on December 6th of 2010, she has never been far from my thoughts and always on my heart.


Thanks for your continued support and prayers. I've been feeling them because my mind is more and more at peace with how things are unfolding in the adoption. Have any of you figured out yet that I have zero patience? NONE, nada, not on my own, that is.

This Post is Dedicated to Sonya

Okay...so ever since November 11, 2010 our family life has almost been nothing but a big blur.  Why, you ask?  Because it was on November 11 that we woke up to a first-floor flooded bathroom and kitchen!  Followed by eight wonderful and relaxing days at a brand new Holiday Inn only five miles from home, followed by a few "hellish" weeks of renovations to our kitchen and bathroom coupled with the beginning stages of the adoption process of Mei Mei who we had no idea of until she happened.  A whole lot of mold was torn out of the walls in our bathroom and kitchen, much of it pre-existing,  and I can't help but wonder if everything we went through with the flood was leading up to a way for God to prepare our home and make it safe for our second China-born daughter to come home to....

So anyone following our story knows how many fundraisers we did in a three month period.  I incredulously tell folks, "Three in three months."   Starting in February through mid-June, I was all about organizing events to make money to defray adoption costs. That is why I say to you now, our family life has almost been nothing but a big blur. 

Now, I will swiftly switch gears and share a few things about the beginning of Sonya's summer vacation, which incidentally didn't really start in June like most children her age, but I would say maybe the second week of July?

Let me just say Sonya has been quite the trooper through all of the ups and downs of our adoption journey, and she's witnessed her mother cry more than a river of tears and somehow manages to keep positive and upbeat about the whole process herself.  Although, Sonya will occasionally exclaim, "Oh, how I wish Mei Mei could be with us right now!  I miss her, momma." 

I will begin with a visit from Sonya's very dear friend and lifelong friend, Lucy.  Lucy came over to our house the week following the fourth of July at which time her mother so graciously cleaned our carpets, for free I might add, getting rid of all the grit and grime accumulated in our home since the parking lot sale at the end of May.  Remember, our entire first floor of our house and entire garage had been used to store sale items until the big parking lot sale day.  And then on into mid-June when we had a garage sale fund raiser at our residence.  Remind me to never do three in three months. ever. again. 

So... where was I?  Oh yeah, Sonya's friend, Lucy.  Lucy btw whom Sonya allowed to dig a splinter out of her foot with a pliers, I mean tweezers, without as much as a wimper.  Okay, obviously I'm exaggerating about referring to the tweezers as pliers, and just so you know, if Lucy wasn't such a little perfectionist I wouldn't have let her come near Sonya's foot with a ten foot pole.  And Sonya btw who can't help but scream bloody murder at the very mention of me taking the end of a sterilized needle ever so carefully and delicately to remove the aforementioned splinter from a body part, namely a hand or foot.  The following picture says it all....

   













When I asked Lucy what her secret was to keeping Sonya so calm throughout the entire twenty minute removal process, she very politely and joyfully declared, "That's because I'm really good at this.  I know what I'm doing, so Sonya doesn't have to be scared."  Thanks a lot, Lucy. 

Once Lucy's mother was finished with the carpets, we took the girls along with Lucy's big sister, Lily, and little brother, Sam, to the new Kreager Park splash pad.  I have to say, really and truly, that day at the splash pad felt like the very first day of summer vacation, for Sonya more specifically.  For goodness sakes am I looking so very forward to slowing way down once we get Mei Mei home from China.  As one adoptive mom put it, "Adoption is not for the faint of heart."

So here's sharing with you a few smiles from Sonya and her special friend, Lucy, who has been with Sonya almost since birth:

Remember to check back soon as I will be posting pictures of Sonya's latest summer adventures at the farms of the Bontragers and Millers.  Sonya doesn't know it yet, but we will be starting back to school the first week in August, so I am trying to show her a really good time filled with good, clean (or dirty - you should have seen Sonya's feet after her full-day excursion at these farms!) fun in the meantime.

THE BERGEY BUNCH: Prayers Requests and Praises

The following is the story of a very special family intent on going about the Father's business in their daily lives, even if His business involves traveling on two separate occasions between now and this Fall to the other side of the world to care for the orphan, two orphans as a matter of fact.  Two very special little girls, the oldest who will age-out next week and who Selina will be bringing home to America very soon.  And who just happens (not! so not!) to live at the very same orphanage as our sweet little Mei Mei.  As you read their incredible story, Selina (who will be traveling alone to China on Sunday except with a toddler in tow!) mentions another mom who has asked to post the Bergey story on their family's adoption blog.  That mom would be me, friends! 

Not only am I asking for intercessory prayer on behalf of this family, for Selina in her travels and for her husband who has committed to staying behind to care for the rest of their children, I am also asking for prayer that LOA (letter of approval) arrives soon so that while Selina is visiting at her daughter's and our daughter's orphanage, Selina will have permission to give our sweet baby girl a gift from us along with a letter written in Mandarin for her caretakers to read to her and pictures of her soon-to-be forever family. 

As a mother, I want so badly for my second China-born daughter to finally know what it feels like when a family who visits her orphanage takes pictures of her, it is for the purpose of sharing them with her forever family who just can't wait to meet her in person and hold her and love her forever!

So...enjoy their story. If you are anything like me, you will cry and cry with tears of JOY when you read this mother's heartfelt words!  And, please, don't forget to pray for them and for us.
THE BERGEY BUNCH: Prayers Requests and Praises

A Place Called Simplicity: I Would If We Had the Money.....

One of the main reasons for starting this adoption blog was/is to educate the public at large and more specifically the body of Christ about the urgent need for families to step up to the plate and make a place in their families for the orphaned children in the world and love them well by modeling Jesus to them so that in their attachment to us, as their moms, dads, brothers and sisters, they will want to come to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ on their own.  Enjoy the good read....    A Place Called Simplicity: I Would If We Had the Money.....

In the Potter's Hand

This morning in Sunday school, we read from the book of Jeremiah and learned how the Lord likens Himself unto the Potter and we unto the clay.  The Lord tells us in Jeremiah 18:6 - "Behold, as the clay is in the Potter's hand, so are ye in mine hand."

With this illustration in mind, our sunday school teacher asked us if the potter, while at work on the potter's wheel, ever throws the clay away .  Someone commented rather than throwing it away when there is a flaw in the work, the potter would instead form it back into a big blob and start all over.  One of the main points of our bible lesson this morning was the reality that when God works on us to reshape us and mold us into His image, the whole process can be quite painful.   

And as silly as it may sound to call myself a big blob of clay that I just know God is reshaping via the international adoption process, let me just say that for the past week I have felt somewhat like a large mass of EXCRUCIATING PAIN walking around for everyone to see as my mind and emotions reel with a tormenting and relentless kind of steady ache through my entire being, threatening to cause me to burst into tears in the middle of the public eye at any given moment...  Let me tell ya, when one feels like that, there is no refuge in that kind of storm.  And yes, one begins to feel like a big blob of God knows what - abandoned, dejected, hopeless, despairing.  Are you getting the picture I hope?

A few days ago I reached out to other families who have adopted from Zhongshan Welfare Institute (this is where my precious little girl is right now) and to these parents who already have or are in the process of adopting internationally, many for the third, fourth and fifth time, by asking for help to "get over" or overcome my depravity because do you want to know something?  A person can only take so much.  Here's what I wrote on this particular yahoo group:

i am hoping to gain some words of wisdom from some parents who have gone before me with adopting an older child. with our first she was a small baby and we didn't receive her pics until 6 weeks before travel and that was hard enough! now we've been looking at our six year old daughter's pics since december, 2010 and LOA is taking way longer than anticipated. if i thought that by screaming at the top of my lungs, and stomping my feet and pounding the walls with my fists would lessen my angst i would do it. nothing right now, not even prayer, seems to ease my mental anguish. and when i am all alone, all i do is cry. how do i hold onto and believe in God's good and perfect timing through this extremely, emotionally difficult time?! help!!!

Shortly following my inquiry came this loving and gracious response from another mother who knows firsthand the anguish that awaits any parent who has been called onto the mission field of international adoption:

I just saw your note. I’m sorry you are hitting a dry spell in the wait for your LOA. The wait simply stinks!  So many of us on the various forums seem to get to that point where it seems as though we can NOT take one more day and yet He carries us through it. I’ve been there in the tears. I’ve snapped at people that didn’t deserve it. I’ve been unfaithful in my doubts. And still, He came through in amazing ways. I promise He is writing your story even tonight when all seems so bleak.


And can I make you a promise to pray with you until your daughter is home? Sincerely, like several times a day? Others have done the same for me and sometimes I think it is what got me through.


I really look forward to hearing how your story unfolds. My daughter Grace is my Zhongshan girl (adopted at just turned 7 in Nov. 2009). She is so precious to us and definitely worth all those tears and sleepless nights!


Many blessings,
Shelley
Mom to 5
http://www.learningtogetherathome.com/

Upon reading Shelley's words for the very first time, I did actually experience somewhat of a lessening of the complete lack of faith and hope I found myself under.  And I believe it kept building throughout the next day when I was at a 4th of July celebration out in the middle of nowhere and a woman I have never met before suggested to me that perhaps God's timing in this matter has nothing to do with my family or my little Mei Mei but just perhaps His timing involves another little child at that very same orphanage who would not be able to handle Mei Mei leaving him or her behind and who needs to be able to leave with their family at the same time Mei Mei does.  


And do you want to know something else?  That scenario posed by this woman whom I've never met before in my entire life is the only one that has brought me any degree of relief or comfort!  And it's the only one that seems to hold back my tears.  Because friends, so much hinges on LOA.  As Mei Mei's mother, I am not allowed any contact with her without it, and nothing else in the adoption process will go any further without LOA.  Nothing.  And all I can think about is getting her home as quickly as possible. 


In addition to all of this, we've received news recently from two separate adoption grant agencies that our applications have been denied.   I didn't know I would take it so hard...


So here we are, maybe, hopefully, only three months away from traveling to get our girl, and we are $15,000 short of our goal.  ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, $16,300 has already been raised for the cause of this particular orphan, our daughter whom I've never met and whom I didn't know even existed before Decemer 6th of 2010 and whom I would do anything for now to free from a life of destitution, from a life void of a forever family and whom would most likely be denied a saving knowledge of Christ Jesus without the intervention God is orchestrating on her behalf right at this very moment through my little family of three. 


Friends, I do not know where the rest of the money will come from.  Will you pray about this for us?  Will you please ask the Lord to show us His will and His way in this matter so that we can continue to move forward without impediment or delay?  With our first adoption, we did it all on our own.  Actually, we ended up taking out a personal loan that caused me to feel the necessity to go back to work the very same week I got home with Sonya from China.  The regret of that decision lingers still.


Of the $16,300 so far gathered, $2,300 of it has come from personal donations ($300 of which is designated specifically toward Sonya's travel expenses).  We have received checks in the mail from friends, family, neighbors and strangers ranging anywhere from $10 to $500.  The rest of the money has come through our three fundraisers ($9,000) and the Show Hope Grant ($5,000).


We still owe $3,100 to Hand in Hand; $4,000 for the rest of our China fees; $5,500 for the orphanage donation; and roughly $8,000 in travel expenses.  


Do you want to know why I am comfortable involving you with all of this?  For one, you have given me permission with your care, concern, prayers and personal involvement already.  For two, because what this whole adoption journey has shown me is that asking for your help with prayers  and money has nothing at all to do with me.  It really has very little to do with my girl either.  Rather, it has to do with what my girl represents and what our family represents in the matter of caring for the orphan and responding to the call.  Some of us will be called out onto the mission field of international adoption while others will be asked to assist.  We are the goers, my little family of three.  And some of you are the senders. Some of you reading this right now will some day be the goers too, and when that day comes, I will rejoice with you, I promise...


One more thing, will you copy and paste our blog address and then send it to everyone on your email list so that we can get the word and the need out to a multitude of people?  We need your help.  Will you please help us?!


And if anyone reading this, after praying to the Lord for His will and His way, feels so inclined as to assist us in our adoption process either financially or by organizing a fund raiser on Mei Mei's behalf, please contact us via c.hoium@yahoo.com and I will share with you our home address or our home phone number.  Thank you so much for caring and for sharing and for praying!   We really couldn't do it without you!